Yulai – A joint session of the EVE Online Roleplay Community (EORC) has voted against allowing the most recent applicant from joining its exclusive membership. The panel of arbiters—which is comprised of members from the oldest roleplay corporations in EVE Online as well as self-acclaimed “experts” on the lore—determined that the applicant, whose name was kept anonymous as is tradition, simply did not possess the qualifications necessary to have their roleplay certified as “real.”
“I knew that the requirements were stringent. I’ve wanted to get involved in EVE Online roleplay since I started playing the game ten years ago. In fact, one of the reasons that I waited so long to apply was so that I could finish my triple doctorate studies in physical chemistry, history, and theology,” the disappointed player said. “But it turns out I just didn’t live up to expectations. It’s a very competitive process and I am hoping to get a letter of recommendation from Max Singularity after I complete my third internship at NASA-Jet Propulsion Laboratory. In the meantime, I want to regroup and concentrate on publishing my fourth full-length science fiction novel. I guess I’m just a little upset that I can’t really enter the scene by posting a few lines on the Intergalactic Summit (IGS) after the CCP events in Kahah, Alkabsi, and Thebeka.”
The “real” certification, much like the “organic” stamp on popular food brands, is a means of quality control over which the EORC has exclusive issuing authority as dictated by CCP regulations. A player without the “real” certification is typically ignored by the entire roleplay community. The “Council of Roleplay Arbitration” (CORA) is the governing body of the EORC and has near authoritarian control over every aspect of roleplay in EVE Online. Arbiters are identified by CCP Delegate Zero and are granted a number of powers and privileges and serve for life. In fact, one of the sitting members of CORA has not undocked since 2010 and is actually unsubbed from the game, but reportedly fielded some of the most gruelling questions such as “What chronicles written before YC119 would you cite as sources if you had to prove a link between Cardinal Sourem Itharen and Gallente popstar Midna?” [Note: The EORC exclusively dates its documentation by the in-game calendar using the “YC” system. In this case, YC119 would be equivalent to 2017]
As the High Roleplay Arbiter Magnificent of this session’s CORA stated, “Part of the mission of the EORC is to be as unwelcoming to new roleplayers as possible. Strikes against this particular applicant included running a new player corporation, producing YouTube tutorials explaining game mechanics, and creating so-called ‘content.’” As was explained further, the EORC defines “content” as PVP interactions involving more than five pilots in a single engagement or any engagement involving the use of “alt” characters.The chairperson concluded on an optimistic note, “Although the applicant was unable to pass our vetting process on this attempt and is hereby deemed ‘unqualified,’ once the five year wait period is over, we will be happy to eviscerate the application again.”
Apart from the power to certify roleplay as “real,” CORA has binding authority over the EORC and can issue directives it deems as necessary for the “health of the community,” including but not limited to: Directing posters on CCP’s official Intergalactic Summit (IGS) forum, skillfully derailing any threads created by “rogue” roleplayers; directing the EORC to ignore events and actions that are taken by unrecognized and uncertified parties; and directly suppressing alternative roleplay venues and views on the lore that might deviate from CORA’s dogma.
In the words of the applicant, “Every arbiter of CORA and every member of the EORC has earned their right to be there and are without a doubt the most qualified individuals to serve as gatekeepers for the community; I definitely understand why I didn’t make it in this round of applications.”
While it’s a disappointing result regarding this persons application that true fact is that he never stood a real chance. The multitude of mistakes he made were to heinous to overlook, he completely forgot that he can only do RP if it follows the rigid lines given to him by the EORC board members in order to validate their superior roleplay and therefore by coming up with his own character and motivations that deviate from this he did it wrong and therefore is unfit to join the illustrious Eve Online Roleplay community. Secondly his studying of Theology indicates he rolled a Amarr which makes him a slave support piece of shit even Out of Character and clearly wont fit in. And no the entire board all being hardcore Matari had no sway in that opinion.
Should have taken the easier route like I did and kidnapped the chairman’s beloved anime catgirl body pillow and held it hostage until allowed entry.
What an idiot, pursued a doctorate instead of focusing on his EVE studies. No wonder he failed.
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