It is inevitable that anything we love doing whether that be a hobby, dream job, relationship, or even your favorite space MMO can become a tiresome thing. You might be in denial at first, but eventually, you come around to the fact that you are indeed tired of the day in and day out grind. We here at EVE Onion News may not be therapists, but we do know a thing or two about being burned out on playing this almost two-decade-old game.
These are 5 signs you are burned out in EVE Online.
You find more joy in watching paint dry than ship spinning in Jita 4-4.
There is a desire to sit on the toilet for hours with diarrhea rather than logging in to do your 12-hour planetary interaction (PI) cycle on your 55 characters.
When it comes to choosing between EVE Online or that mobile game riddled with 30-second ads between every level. you choose the mobile game.
You find yourself browsing the most recent Steam sale for a game that will take your full attention rather than something you can play on the second monitor during a huge TiDi battle.
The final and most definite sign you are burned out on playing EVE Online is that you thought about resubbing to World of Warcraft.
Remember – Just because you are burned out of EVE Online doesn’t mean you have to quit paying your subscription. You and I both know you will be back and you will regret that lost training time. So, stay subbed, and take a break. I’m sure some CCP or community drama will pique your interest in playing again soon enough.
Iceland – Fresh off the heels of the wildly popular and successful Dr. Who event. CCP Games announces the next crossover event! The Icelandic gaming company has partnered with Amazon Studios to bring you The Expanse crossover event. A partnership so perfect for each other you would have thought they would have done it first! Space, factions, cloaking ships, and political drama! The one tv show that mirrors the dark galaxy of New Eden.
Few details have been announced, but certainly with a match such as this we will see all the gloves come off.
‘Twas the night before Yoiul, when all through the chain Not a core probe was stirring as I mashed d-scan in vain; My Proteus smart-bombs were heated with care, In hopes that a newbro soon would be there.
My alts were cloaked up all safe at a spot; While I dreamed of day-trippers or even a bot; With Die Hard on one screen and a lap full of cat, I decided to get out the Domis and rat.
When suddenly a new sig popped up into view, And I mashed d-scan again to see what came through. XMS-021 was the new sig on my list, I narrowed my d-scan and gnawed on my fist.
A heron appeared on my scan, and then probes, It warped to safe and I focused my lobes. I scanned down the hole in a quick single pass, Then warped to it at range to check out the mass.
I paused for a moment to admire the view, Then suddenly not only one Praxis, but two! They each warped to their own site launching cruises at range, They were not even remote-rep, how retro and strange!
I pinged on corp comms for bombers all matched, As I hurried to execute the plan I just hatched. We warped bombers to pings, then anchored two bubbles, Hoping like heck it was all worth the trouble.
I decloaked the Proteus and saw with delight, That the Praxii aligned and prepared to take flight. After eons they warped away straight to the hole, Where they piled up nicely – exactly my goal!
We decloaked the bombers and aligned them the same, I giggled on comms as I called each by name: “Launch, Dasher! now, Dancer! now Prancer and Vixen! Launch, Comet! and, Cupid! and, Donner NOT Blitzen!”
Let fly seven bombs and warp off to a spot! Or don’t, and launch torps, but be sure they are hot! The bombs hit their target, and Blitzen held fire, Both Praxii dissolved into loot and charred wire.
The fits – they were blingy, and the pods were as well, The loot fairy said “Yes” and the killmails were swell. With virtual high-fives, we looted the wrecks, We scooped blue loot and A-types and exchanged lots of keks.
A poll popped on Discord – what should we do, The newbros in Praxii are feeling so blue. They aren’t salty at all, but we know how it goes, When you lose ships and loot it’s true that it blows.
The Heron is still here, trapped in our hole, Which gives birth to a new plan, and a new content goal: One vee one in the bubble, two Herons alone, Ships to the death, but no harm to the clones.
The gauntlet is thrown, and the Chad takes the fight, This is the way, it is awesome and right. The Herons warp in to the well bubbled zone, The scout has no weapons, but overheats drones.
Railguns and rockets make quick work of the scout, But he gives “gf” in local as he takes the hole out. I move a Praxis and Skin Crate into my Astero, And warp to the hole now wobb’ly and narrow.
I splash into to their hole and jet-can the crate, Happy to gift it after this, our first date. Their rollers warp in as I rename the can right: “Happy Christmas to all, and thanks for gud fites!”
After tons of angry and disparate responses to the recent mining update patch, CCP is testing a new QoL feature to help smooth the typical “grr change”. Banking on the success of proximity voice chat in other popular games such as Escape from Tarkov, CCP hopes to improve dispositions by implementing a radial-range, capsuleer-to-area voice broadcast.
Currently the proximity voice is unbound to any hotkey, but a Capsuleer can enable the Proximity Voice Channel in their settings, and bind it to a key with Push to Talk (PTT) or Toggle On/Off. Other players with their Proximity Voice Channel enabled will be able to hear broadcasted voice communication in real time from any Capsuleer within the range. The range is restricted to 1000km, or “small gang grid” size according to update notes; however, possible system-wide Voice Broadcasts have been hinted at in the blog post, with possibilities of being tied to Citadel modules.
CCP reminds Capsuleers that the same rules and ToS apply to voice communications as with in-game text communications, and discourages any hate speech or harassment via the Proximity Voice Channel. Its goal is to open dialogue and encourage interaction within the MMO, which is in keeping with the implementation of AIR and NPE improvements recently. When Onion asked what sort of impact the voice channels will have upon server and client performance, especially in large scale engagement/TIDI scenarios, community management on the forums declined to comment.
As you know, I am a null bear Rorqual tycoon. I currently command a fleet of fifty excavator drone hives, which operate under an umbrella of pure autism. I live in a Spodstar, and the gates to my invincible domain are permanently bubbled by some newbros that I hired on Fiver. If any neutrals approach within 20 jumps of my bastion, my bot automatically logs off to online fifty highsec Orcas.
Recently, CCP has made a number of changes to the mining meta which are thoroughly concerning to me. In particular, I am worried about the impact this will have upon new players. New players seeking to make inroads into nullsec are already challenged enough by the realities of my complete and utter domination. However, CCP now wants to make things even more challenging, by nerfing mining?
I’ve talked to a lot of new players, who watch me suck up entire belts before they can lock a single rock, and they are all gravely concerned about the impact these changes will have upon the new player experience. If new players cannot find a meaningful way to challenge me, then they will have no choice but to join the other new players, who endlessly circle the gate and wonder whether anyone will ever enter local.
Right now, I am mining as much as possible, in order to build up my reserves beyond infinity. What will new players do when they cannot grind like me? How will new players find their purpose in EVE Online, without the ability to AFK mine literally all day every single day for twenty years straight?
This reminds me of how CCP has recently been trying to ban my bots. I typically run several dozen Ishtars and VNI bots, which continue to earn income while I sleep, but CCP wants to nerf botting into the ground. CCPLEASE! How will new players manage to get ahead in the game, if they cannot bot all day like me? My accounts were recently banned, and it was really annoying to generate entirely new characters. Fortunately, I can afford to skill inject my new bots, but new players simply cannot compete if CCP continues to wage this campaign against the little guy.
Ultimately, I think it’s clear that CCP needs to make significant buffs to capital class mining barges and superexhumers. It’s hard enough for me to get by, with a trillion ISK invested in AFK Jita market trade botting, and new players need access to these same opportunities so that they can compete. We all need to stand together and demand that CCP reverse scarcity and work overtime to ensure that we can all enjoy automated gameplay.
Dedicated white-hat hackers have uncovered files revealing that EVE’s Quadrant 4 will lead up to player-made stargates by means of materials gathered through Solar Interaction. An anonymous product manager, confronted with the evidence, confirmed this suspicion.
“I suppose there is no reason to deny the obvious,” the product manager affirmed, “we are quite pleased to release Solar Interaction with Quadrant 4. This is the next great triumph for our new data-driven product design philosophy. Our metrics indicate that players spend more time interacting with Planetary Interaction than with any mechanism in the game other than ship spinning, which we have already improved significantly. Since this means that PI is clearly a favorite gameplay experience, and stars in New Eden have previously been useful only as eye candy and tools for creating deep-safes, we are pleased to integrate this under-utilized but attractive solar system feature with the favorite user interface mechanic in order to deliver a new and yet familiar gameplay experience.”
Although details are scarce, initial indications suggest exploration vessels will be able to launch a new class of survey probes to identify which resources are available in a particular star. The available resources will change throughout the solar year as calculated by the average rotation period of all planets in the system. Once identified, well-tanked battleships will be capable of withstanding the brutal environment close to the star itself in order to deliver a Solar Interaction base station. When the harvest job completes, a Coronal Mass Ejection will occur, delivering a short-lived coronal mass field into orbit where it can be harvested by ORE industrials.
The extracted materials will be used to create warp gates, eventually allowing players to create wormholes connecting any two systems within a region, but initially restricted to allowing corvettes and Sisters of Eve, Edencom, and ORE frigates access to Jove space. Warp gate restrictions may be briefly lifted by applying PLEX technology in order to allow passage of up to battleship-class vessels.
That’s the sentiment that CCP Games is promoting in their latest update to EVE Online, set to release in the Spring of 2022. This update aims to promote more positivity between CCP and the EVE player community, something that has been missing from the game for quite some time. Taking note of a recent initiative by Youtube to remove “dislikes” from videos, CCP is experimenting with a similar change by removing the “thumbs down” button from the EVE options menu.
“At CCP, we strive to be a place where capsuleers of all playstyles and opinions can share their feedback.” said CCP Burger, Creative Director for EVE Online. “A couple of years ago we implemented a feedback system into EVE’s options menu, in which players could indicate with a simple ‘thumbs up’ or ‘thumbs down’ whether they were enjoying the game. And EVE players, being EVE players, surprised us in a way that we couldn’t have possibly predicted: By coming together and clicking the ‘thumbs down’ button en masse. Incredible!”
The history of EVE is filled with moments where large groups of players have joined forces to achieve a common goal. Whether it’s competing in years-long conflicts for sovereignty, working together to construct massive starbases, or protesting CCP’s development philosophy.
We asked Burger what effect, if any, this negative feedback had on morale at CCP.
“It was certainly a shock,” he said. “Truthfully, we added the ‘thumbs down’ button as a joke. It never occurred to us that anyone would actually use it. So when we saw that data coming in, it forced us to rethink our strategy.”
As EVE approaches its third decade, CCP has had ample opportunity to learn what makes the players happy. And this isn’t the first time they’ve been compelled to adjust their approach based on player feedback.
“We value the opinions of our players very much, but we also want to encourage positive discourse. That’s why with our Spring update, which we are referring to internally as ‘Stockholm’, we will be removing the ‘thumbs down’ button from the feedback system. We feel this will allow for more constructive comments from our players. Our hope is that this will make the GMs and developers who are reading the feedback feel better about the work they are doing.”
We asked Burger if he could give us any hints about what else we can expect in the update.
“We have complete confidence that you will want to smash that like button!”, he said with a nervous chuckle.
EVE players insist spending hours doing mind-numbingly boring labor isn’t work, but “fun”, despite having all the characteristics of the worst jobs on the planet.
It has been revealed that Negrul Voda, a hardcore EVE player, does not believe what he is doing is “work” despite spending eight hours a day, 40 hours a week looking at spreadsheets of market price fluctuations.
“It’s so much fun, this game. Last week I saw how the Caldari Drake went down by half a percent in value and I immediately took notice of the situation and bought as many of them as I could. The increase of zero point six percent in value ISK made me a solid return on investment of the price difference, minus the taxation costs and administrative labor. I just had to look at a price spreadsheet for a few hours and it was as easy as that.”
Psychologist Frank Nahome commented on the statement made by the EVE player by saying:
“A lot of players are under the impression that grueling shifts spent staring down spreadsheets, or hauling goods from one system to another for hours for what is literally pennies in real-life currency, is not real work.”
Another EVE player, A. Nagumo, told EVE onion: “I just can’t wait to come home from 8 hours of grueling work as a warehouse worker for Amazon to haul Asteros and frigates to null-sec for hours at a time for what would be literal pennies in real currency.”
When asked why he needs the ISK, if he has no time to spend it on exciting experiences, the player said:
“I have an omega subscription to pay, ISK losses from ganked ships I need to recoup. I don’t have time for that kind of thing. ISK isn’t made on trees, and I can’t default to Alpha you know.”
On 13 April 2021, CCP removed empty asteroid belts from space after having stripped them of asteroids several months earlier. Frustrated players were unsatisfied with CCP’s approach to mudflation, even though it was rumored this was a necessary step in the complete eradication of POS code in order to establish a more firm foundation upon which to build future enhancements.
Using POS code for asteroid belts was a “no brainer.” Asteroids were orbiting structures with which players could interact, and which players could destroy by applying specialized weapons. By leveraging the feature-rich Player Owned Starbase code, CCP was able to significantly reduce the time required for the June 2011 ‘Incarna’ release with improvements to the visual effects associated with mining lasers. Nobody had any idea how far the Cthulhu-esque tentacles of POS code would spread.
With asteroid belts fully detangled from POS code, CCP rolled out a patch on 14 September, 2021 that began the process of restoring asteroid belts to Null Security space.
Those changes had unexpected consequences.
When Naoki Yoshida tasked Hideyuki Kasuka with accelerating development of Final Fantasy XIV v2.0 in 2012, he wanted to target both Microsoft Windows and PlayStation 3. Of course, he looked at EVE Online. Hideyuki Kasuka’s friend CCP Redacted was an intern at CCP at the time on the project that would become Dust 514, and targeted the same platforms. The CCP intern, excited about the first draft of his new creation, labeled only “POS Code,” shared it with Kasuka one evening. The two spent hours drinking heavily while poring over just over 1 million lines of undocumented code delivering a deliciously broad feature set.
As development of FFXIV progressed, and pressed for time, Kusuka borrowed a few utility features from the POS code, fully intending to replace it soontm. Over the years, “Hideyuki Engineering Reference Objects” (HERO) code made itself useful time after time, while the task HERO CoRe (HERO Code Refactoring) never seemed to make it from the parking lot to the Kanban board.
In 2021, soontm finally arrived with a bang.
With asteroid belts extracted from POS code, the belt abstraction was retired, and asteroids became first class citizens, paving the way for improved asteroid mechanics sure to drive dozens of miners back into space. A cheer went up in CCP headquarters as 70% of tests went green, squeezing past the critical threshold. Aura’s voice came over the PA, proclaiming “Docking request accepted,” and announcing that a push to main had completed its DevOps journey to Tranquility.
A few hours later, a FFXIV test engineer scratched her head. Belts were broken. The situation escalated rapidly. A senior developer was called in, then a network engineer. The three racked their brains and pored over code. Tripwire showed belt code making a call to a remote server while calculating… something. Days later, they made the call: belts had to go.
When questioned about the situation, Anonymous Game Developer shrugged, grinned slyly, then said “we already stole all your players, we don’t need your code anymore.”
With the exciting news of a coming revitalized new player experience (dubbed AIR NPE by CCP), we at EVE Onion decided to collaboratively give our takes on the reveal post from CCP. In this article we have taken a screenshot of sections and give our takes on each, segment-by-segment. We’re happy to see EVE newbies get the tailored, fresh introduction to New Eden they deserve.
[Dyvinex] I thought plex was the lifeblood of EVE…
[Opus] I thought new players were for ganking relentless in high sec until they decided to quit the game…
[TheDuck] I thought salty tears were the lifeblood of EVE, whether frustrated vets, 3-day old pilots who skilled into the hull of a battleship and can’t figure out why dramiels keep killing their ‘invincible’ ships, or the lone miner who sits there for hours in a venture and afterward has their hauler ganked while aligning to Jita 4-4 “for the lols”….just to go back to the system and start up the Miner I’s in their Venture sobbing quietly but stalwartly into their Monster drink so they can make their meticulously spreadsheet-calculated ISK quota for today, now risk-adjusted for hauler ganks.
[Erutor] We are confident that by setting the expectation that EVE Online consists of a series of compelling story driven experiences, new capsuleers will wander about in space looking for the next story hub. This will “introduce” those capsuleers to veteran players and provide the opportunity to develop the seething thirst for revenge necessary to ensure their first PLEX purchase.
[Erutor] “Step 3: Purchase PLEX” – this is an essential skill best learned early in one’s capsuleer experience.
[Dyvinex] I was told players who got ganked had a higher retention rate. CCP should just hire CODE. to improve the NPE.
[TheDuck] CCP was quick to learn that ‘hope’ is neither a tactic nor a strategy upon which one may gamble one’s fiscal outlook.
[Opus] Isn’t reddit the sole source of information on how and why players play and understand the narrative of EVE Online?
[TheDuck] In October, membership will increase by what can only be statistically categorized as random chance, but declare a success nonetheless. In November, membership will resume its downward spiral, not unlike Pearl Abyss shares, or the hopes and dreams of those left at CCP.
[Erutor] Biomasses character on SISI to create an empty slot. “NEW FEATURE! Characters created on SISI will be mirrored to TQ. In the case of a conflict between character slots, the character most recently created will persist.”
[Dyvinex] I have to log into SISI? Pass.
[Opus] SInce when does CCP do their testing on the test server?
[Aiko] This seems like a scam.
[Dyvinex] Aura: “Hey, you, you’re finally awake. You were trying to cross the border into Solitude…”
[Erutor] … they will meet and be betrayed by Aura, their ~~trusty ~~AI companion, who will regularly remind players to engage autopilot.
[TheDuck] While exiting the game, players pass through the various stages of grief, exhibiting signs of Stockholm Syndrome, desperate to preserve their sanity yet, like a moth to a flame, ambling with zombie-like intent back to their gooey pods.
[TheDuck] The fresh take on desperate flailing exhibited through random ‘features’ and ‘offerings’ while membership plummets, resembling nothing like purpose or context, is sheer coincidence.
[Dyvinex] ‘Careful introspection’? This is where that starts? So does this mean we get Avatar Cat Ears soonTM?
[Erutor] We estimate that the expectation of purpose and context trigger individuals on the Autism spectrum to associate their own lack of purpose and context with their lack of ISK and skill points. Details on SP discounts for NPE participants to follow.
[Dyvinex] So they’re… implementing some sort of graph to help players with development? What dev has the players do the w- oh, right.
[Erutor] Theta clone subscribers will find the nodegraph editor in their Utilities menu, where they can define their own nodegraphs. These nodegraphs may be executed by fitting a Bio-Obsolescence Technology module to any Marauder-class ship or any ship with the BOT Slot activated (42 PLEX in the store now!), and installing the nodegraph script.
[Erutor] More dynamic visuals will ensure players lose control of their ships in the middle of combat and increase destruction by 22.8%. This will encourage new players to experience the recently improved(tm) industry experience.
[Erutor] spoiler The gradual UI reveal includes a randomized encounter with Aura in the shower. The nodegraph for this encounter includes several opportunities for proximity-triggered interactions. We anticipate this will improve replayability of the NPE. Some players may choose to simply replay this encounter repeatedly if they’re looking for a 2 minute play-session without consequences or commitment.
[TheDuck] Why fix it when you can slap a fresh coat of paint on it and call it “New and Improved!” ?
[Aiko] The new video integration showing me boarding a ship was very helpful in teaching me that I am in a spaceship.
[TheDuck] As this chart clearly shows, you wander aimlessly from point to point while the background changes….and nothing else.
[Dyvinex] Is this… Supposed to help new players be less confused? I’m more confused looking at this than before.
[Dyvinex] Please, oh please, let that first hyperlink be to r/eve.
[TheDuck] Ultimately, the goal of this revitalized new player journey is to bring the thrill and joy of EVE to as many people as possible — we’ll let you know we find either.
[Dyvinex] Maybe the EVE Academy will more efficiently teach new players to connect to hisec mining corps with Orca boosts and low mining tax!
[Erutor] Wait… offramps? So the idea is to make new players hate the game and exit immediately? This is amazeballs – it took me years to get to the point that I realized how much I hate most of this game!
[Akio] Yeah the offramps thing struck me as odd too, like “wheeeeee I’m a new player, time to log off!”.
