RMT Scam Continues as Community Embraces EVE 2 Beta


Embedded deep in RMT territory, your humble spai continues to bring you, dear readers, all the salacious details as Rushlock, Frank the Bank, and Hazelton, the Rushlock Media Triad (RMT), continue to nurture their growing RMT empire, and scheme to dominate New Eden’s present and future.

1ronBank, unaffiliated with RMT, has recently returned to streaming—where scores of watchers lurk—hoping to get a slice of his unassailable wealth. 1ronBank may or may not have anything to do with this article or with RMT, but it just seemed wrong to omit the opportunity to drop a famous name in the context of the initials RMT, and possibly miss better visibility on Google.

CCP*, in a brilliant move to avoid criticism over microtransactions, and lay a foundation for the EVE 2: Rush to Second Genesis business model, announced that all microtransactions and loot boxes would be managed by and for players under the watchful eye of CCP_SorryGuysNoStreamToday (formerly known as Frank the Bank). CCP_PlausibleDeniability affirmed that “CCP_SorryGuysNoStreamToday is not a CCP employee, but is clearly the right choice to coordinate, observe, and advise this player-run initiative as part of our growing community team. Even his name makes it obvious he’s a financial wizard!”

“Our new model, which we refer to as P2P, or ‘Peer to Peer’ RMT, is the cornerstone of our future success,” CCP_SorryGuysNoStreamToday clarified. “CCP will apply a small per-transaction fee as consideration for facilitating each transaction between players, and may or may not choose, at some point, to seed the market or sell items directly after determining which items have the highest value, in order to ensure the market remains fluid, dynamic, and fun!”

“This takes us to the next level,” a well-informed insider source promised. “New Eden had the first and only fully player-driven economy. The Second Genesis cluster will offer the first player-run organized virtual crime network and black market with both in-game and out-of-game assets and influence. We are breaking new ground!”

CCP_SorryGuysNoStreamToday, in light of his new responsibilities as under-secretary of RMT asset whelping, announced he would transition his portion of the stream schedule to personal grooming and ship cleaning, in order to focus more specifically upon EVE 2 scams. “I hate beards, and people who have beards,” he said, stroking his scruffy chin.

The real news, as it always is in anything related to EVE Online, is the community’s response.

In this case, the RMT viewer response to the previous exposee on the EVE 2: Rush to Second Genesis beta key scam is sickening. RMT viewers, eager to cash in, have embraced the idea wholeheartedly, and are now advancing multiple proposals to dominate the Second Genesis galactic cluster before and upon arrival.

In addition to selling EVE 2 Beta keys, RMT viewers presented a proposal to sell permits to transfer assets from EVE to the EVE 2 Beta. The transfer would necessarily involve assigning the assets to an authorized RMT agent in New Eden, with a promised delivery of said assets from New Eden to the Second Genesis cluster Soon™, depending upon availability of this area to star system citizens. Rumor has it that contracts are already flooding in.

The Second Genesis cluster, with initial access via Jove space, has no existing stargate or station infrastructure. In light of this, RMT associates announced plans to monopolize early stargate anchor points, then offer Cluster Organization Distribution Entitlement (CODE) permits to a small selection of corporations and individuals with sufficient assets. These “Non-Organizational Permittee or Organizational RMT Subscribers” (NOPOORS) would have exclusive access to the Second Genesis cluster. Basic CODE Permits would allow time-limited permission for NOPOORS to enter the Second Genesis cluster.

Add-on permits available as P2P microtransactions would allow transit between systems in the Second Genesis cluster. CCP_SorryGuysNoStreamToday, in his first press appearance, indicated, “the intent is to provide players with a sense of pride and accomplishment for unlocking different permit levels.”

James315, of New Eden’s CODE. fame, was not approached for feedback, but is assumed to back this plan wholeheartedly, as it establishes a high barrier to bot-aspirancy in the Second Genesis cluster, even if it borrows his meme. “It’s true that anyone can claim control of anything,” James 315 proclaimed, in a quote taken entirely out of context, but clearly indicating that RMT may claim control of the Second Genesis cluster and stargates, and use the CODE acronym.

*Community Content Providers. Any resemblance to Center for Competitive Politics, Capacitively coupled plasma, CCP Games, Certified Cheese Professionals, the now-defunct CCCP (USSR), or any other “CCP” are entirely coincidental.